That is a controversial topic. Some say something like L2ARC is the most gentle workload the SSD could have, so even consumer SSDs would be fine. I haven’t ever had L2ARC, so can’t really advise anything. IMO, you can be ok with any SSD, because even if you lose your L2ARC drive, you won’t lose any data.
Well, you do you. Sounds reasonable to me if that’s what you ask.
I have 0 experience with synology, so can’t say for sure. There is a concept of special VDEV (aka sVDEV or metadata VDEV) in zfs that can store the metadata. However, unlike L2ARC, this vdev cannot be lost (or you will lose the data of your entire pool). So it must be at least mirrored.
If you decide to go special vdev route, you should do it from the very start, because already written metadata won’t migrate to the sVDEV. Also, afaik, you can’t remove it from the pool afterwards. So it should be planned carefully.
IMO, you don’t need it (and I’m in “team sVDEV” myself). With a big dataset’s recordsize (1-4M) you should not have much metadata, and it probably would be already cached in the ARC. Otoh, if your NAS is only occasionally on, your cache probably won’t be filled. Well, to answer your original topic-starting question – you don’t need much ram for a non 24/7 NAS, because your ARC won’t be properly filled anyway. Mb this discussion (of special vdev) would be useful.
Have no clue about btrfs in general, and synology btrfs in particular. In zfs you can should have different datasets (with different tunnables like record size, compression etc.) for different kinds of data (for the record, photos and videos can be considered the same kind of data – both being big, uncompessible files). Then you create different SMB/NFS shares (in truenas) that point to different datasets.